On a post a couple of days ago, people started quoting different slightly sarcastic sayings or “laws.” I ended up having enough fun reading them that I thought I would repost them here and ask whether you have some favorite slightly sarcastic sayings. If you do, would you post them here?
The real difference between optimist and pessimist is this: The optimist says, “Everything is going as well as can be expected! This is the best of all possible worlds!” The pessimist says, “I agree.”
Commenting on whether the glass if half full or half empty, another poster said:
I have to add the engineer’s corollary to the glass metaphor: We’re using the wrong glass.
For the truly pessimistic, see the law below:
I prefer Finagle’s Law, “The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.”
Finally, here is one that I think can truly be applied to the current political climate:
My favorite maxim is Hanlon’s Razor: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
So, do you have a favorite sarcastic saying? Please do not name anyone in specific and keep it moderately clean.
Thought this was good: Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
Thought this was good: Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
On a bumper sticker: “Murphy was an optimist.”
Pessimistic version: “Life is tough and then you die”.
The optimistic version: “Life sucks but it beats the alternative”.
Or on marriage: A man is alone in a forest. He says something. Is he still wrong?
Saw this one at the post office in our campus:
“In order to get a loan, you first have to prove that you don’t need it.”
“The glass is half empty or half full depending on whether it was in the process of being emptied or in the process of being filled when that process stopped.”
Here’s another: “half of one, six dozen of the other.”
It’s six of one, half dozen of the other…..=D
“No good deed goes unpunished”.
A personal favorite of mine is, “If it’s bad news then it’s news, if it’s good news then it’s just PR”.
Have you ever bailed out a sinking boat? Half-empty is the optimist’s point of view in that case.
I’ve got heaps 😛
An armed soldier at the front line says, “The sun rotates around us and the Earth stays still.”
Of course he’s wrong. But his fellow doesn’t say anything.
Because huge soldier guys with guns are right.
And a good one for Memorial Day also. LOL.