God and reverse psychology

https://inteligencialimite.org/2024/08/07/f9n499t The Onion, a satirical Christian news magazine, reports on their Onion Radio News broadcast about a man Randall Devoraux who tried to use reverse psychology on God in his prayers. But the word from The Onion is that they were neither fooled nor impressed by Randall’s attempt to fool God.

Buy Alprazolam Online Legally While this duck is not privy to the content of Randall’s prayer, I can just about imagine it. Too many times your commentator has heard such prayers expressed at prayer meetings. Formulaic phrases such as, “Lord, I know I really don’t deserve this but . . .” and, “Lord, I am not worthy but I ask you in your mercy . . .” abound in such prayers. It is obvious reverse psychology. I am sure that they want God to feel so sorry for them that He will give them just what they want. Why, I mean, it is just the Christian version of making puppy eyes! No, no, no, one needs to approach God from a position of self-confidence and inner strength, after all . . . . uh, excuse me a moment, I am getting a call from on high. Hold, please.

Buy Xanax Powder Uhm, yes Lord, I had forgotten about the centurion who came to you saying, “Lord, I am not worthy that thou shouldest come under my roof: but speak the word only, and my servant shall be healed.” Uhm, well, I agree, Lord, the woman at Tyre and Sidon was very humble and very willing to receive any crumbs you might give her, and you most certainly did praise her. Well, yes, there was that woman who washed your feet and you spoke of her faith in the highest of terms. Certainly, I remember that you said, “I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones.” Quite frankly, I had forgotten that the prayer most frequently prayed in the Orthodox liturgy is, “Lord, have mercy.”

https://mandikaye.com/blog/0zqr0dlbq81 But, I thought that you wanted us to take a stand about our being Sons of the Most High! Uhm, yes, that does, indeed, work wonderfully against demons. Ha, ha, yes they certainly do run when they hear your name being uttered by one of his sons or daughters! Oh, I see, you want us to have the heart of a Prodigal Son towards you. Well, I can certainly understand that. “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you, and I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me like one of your hired servants.” Oh, I see, we are to take his position and wait for You to lift us up. And, yes, you have promised to lift us up and to love us and to feast with us in Your Supper. And, yes, you have gifted us with Your Holy Spirit so that we may change from glory to glory. . . . I understand, Lord, I have to always keep a humble heart.

https://solomedicalsupply.com/2024/08/07/eh3f1uhe No, no, don’t worry Lord, the tail feathers are only rather singed and will grow back. A little extra incense during the Divine Liturgy will cover their stink. I am sure they will be a good reminder to me during the time I have to walk until they grow fully back. Yes, it is, indeed, a very good object lesson that will keep me humble. Thank you, I will see you this Sunday at Supper. I look forward to it.

https://merangue.com/39ts3g6z OK, I am sorry that I had to put you all on hold. Ahh, forget everything I said at the beginning. Oh, you overheard my side of the conversation. How about if I just say, “until next time.” Goodbye!